When Tina Parman goes to her local pizza place, she puts out flyers for her yard sale.
She does it at her veterinarian, in downtown Williamsburg and pretty much anywhere she goes. But Parman’s active marketing isn’t because she wants to make a quick buck.
It’s because she wants a grandson.
“It was hard to have to wait to adopt my dog, much less my grandchild,” she said. “My daughter is so deserving, but the process is so frustrating. Anything I can do to help, I’ll do.”
On Saturday, Parman and her family will host a yard sale at their home to raise money to help her daughter, Melanie Dabbs, and son-in-law, Luke Dabbs adopt a child from Sierra Leone.
But Dabbs, a resident of Raleigh, North Carolina, said one of the biggest hurdles is simply finding the cost for the adoption. Including flight, adoption fees and visas, she said her and her husband are expecting to pay around $35,000.
Related story: A new family: Adoption and foster care in James City County
Dabbs said she has wanted to adopt internationally since she was a little girl. Both her and her mother fondly retell the story of Dabbs, at 4 years old, being thrilled and fascinated when she was on an airplane flying from Indonesia that had a number of families with adopted children.
Since then, she said she knew she wanted to adopt a child internationally.
Earlier in the fall, one of Dabbs’ friends adopted from an orphanage in Sierra Leone and when she showed Dabbs the photo, one little boy stood out. Dabbs said she and her husband fell in love with that boy before they even knew his story.
Sharing the love
They learned the little boy they were wanting to adopt had been badly burned by boiling water and would need surgery to repair his skin. At 5 years old, their potential adopted son was already in need of extra love and care and Dabbs said her family was ready to give it.
Adopting children with special needs, from physical to mental needs, can be a big commitment for any potential adoptive parent, said Rebecca Vinroot, director of social services for James City County.
While Vinroot does not deal with international adoptions, she said parents considering adopting children with special needs always have to consider the cost associated with potentially extra care.
More than anything these potential parents need a strong support system.
“It takes a special person to adopt a special child,” Vinroot said. “Parenting is hard to begin with. But when you adopt or foster children, you can’t do it alone.”
And support is just what Parman is ready to give.
Parman said she and her husband just moved to Williamsburg in January but the location has been a staple in her, and her children’s lives, for decades. She said she used to take her daughters to Colonial Williamsburg to learn about history and enjoy the local sites. Now, she said she is excited to share the unique experience of Williamsburg with her future grandchild.
“It’s so exciting to be able to pass on Colonial Williamsburg to him,” Parman said. “I’ll be making him costumes and getting him passes. Since moving here the community has been wonderful and we are just excited to introduce it to him.”
But the cost of adoption is still high and while the yard sale on Saturday won’t cover all of the funds, Parman and her family hope to spread the word into the community.
The yard sale will be on Saturday from 7 a.m. to 2 p.m. at 2888 Sandy Bay Road. Parman will be selling items from her family’s time abroad in Europe and Dabbs will be bringing items to sell from their home in Raleigh.
To learn more about the Dabbs’ adoption, visit Reece’s Rainbow, a special needs adoption support system, online.
