ARLINGTON — The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy and celebration but for many Virginians, it can also be a deep emotional struggle. Grieving the loss of a loved one, a relationship or even a pet can make the festive season feel heavy.
According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, 64% of people with depression report the holidays make them feel worse.
Dr. J. Kim Penberthy, professor of psychiatry and neurobehavioral sciences at the University of Virginia, underscored the importance of self-reflection and realistic expectations.
“Maybe it is you need to lay on the couch and watch a movie,” Penberthy suggested. “You have to check in with yourself, though, and give yourself that ability to say, ‘OK, what do I need right now to get through this grief? Knowing that maybe I’m not going to make it all better but at least I won’t make it worse.'”
Penberthy encouraged people to practice self-compassion and avoid pressuring themselves to meet unrealistic holiday expectations. If you or someone you know is struggling with a mental health crisis, help is available 24/7. Call or text 988, the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, to connect with someone for free and confidential support.
While many enjoy the snowy holiday scenes, the state’s long winters and reduced daylight can also worsen depression, especially for those with Seasonal Affective Disorder.
Dr. Ibrahim Sablaban, a psychiatrist and addiction medicine physician with Corewell Health in Michigan, advised sharing emotions with trusted family and friends and reflecting on happy memories of loved ones.
“To be able to embrace the traditions and the things that you shared with that individual, even if they’re not in your presence,” Sablaban recommended. “To be able to keep those things alive.”
Mental health professionals also stressed while family traditions can provide comfort and remembrance, it is OK to let go if they become too painful. Explore new ways to celebrate and over time, new traditions will naturally evolve.
